Let’s meet, eh ;)

I owe you an apology and a small technological confession: I’ve just discovered that my booking form has decided to stop… forming.

Fear not. I’m on the case. I may not be a computer scientist, but I am extremely stubborn, which means I will absolutely watch approximately 30 YouTube tutorials until something works, something breaks further, or I achieve enlightenment.

And if none of that works? Well, I will be composing a very polite but deeply disheartening “I’m not angry, I’m just disappointed” email to the fine people hosting my form widget. Possibly with bear mace. Possibly with feelings.

In the meantime, please reach out to me via email. Think of it as a charmingly retro booking experience, like vinyl records, handwritten letters, or flirting that involves actual sentences instead of three emojis and a “u up?”

If possible, please include your screening information in the same message. The sooner we get the logistics out of the way, the sooner we can get to the far more enjoyable part of the scenario: preparing our date. Planning the fun is half the fun, after all. Efficiency is sexy, organization is sexy, and nothing ruins a good mood quite like ten emails that could have been one.

Email: kiranielsen@proton.me

Acceptable screening options

• Government-issued ID (feel free to hide information like your address or things of the like, but I need to see your name and photo.

• LinkedIn account (A real one, ideally, not one heroically created 47 seconds ago with three connections, a stock photo in a suit, and a motivational quote about “grinding.”

• A reference from a provider you have seen in the last 10 months.